Finland for Thought
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30.12.2009

Top 10 Amazing Finnish Winter Attractions

Tags: Ridiculous,Visiting FI — Author: @ 7:50 pm

Visit an Eskimo Village

How did Finns live over 200 years ago? Why not see for yourself! Finland’s indigenous eskimos (known as “Sami” in Finnish) are scattered throughout villages in the northern part of the country. Some villages still don’t have accessible roads leading to them, an eskimo guide can be hired to take you there for a reasonable fee.

 

Swim with the Penguins, Play with the Polar Bears

Finland is home to the world’s largest polar bear habitat, and second largest penguin habitat. While penguins are only found on Finland’s Arctic Coast. polar bears can be found all over Finland, even in Southern Finland during the winter during migration season. Don’t forget your binoculars!

 

World’s Largest Snowball

Finland is responsible to several records in the Guiness Book of World Records. Arguably its proudest record is the annual World’s Largest Snowball in Jakobstad. Each September the entire village’s male population spend five days creating this monstrosity and each year they attempt to break the previous year’s record. Be sure to visit by June before it melts!

 

24 Hours of Complete Darkness

For six months (from October to March), Finland is in a state complete darkness. While most humans would see this as a time of depression and despair, the Finns see it as a celebration! Snow, family time, sleeping in, reading, naps, television, going to bed early and alcohol…like the Finnish polar bears, Finns hibernate to prepare for summer!

 

Zamboni Races

Finns are known throughout the world for their zany annual competitions: Air Guitar, Wife-Carrying, Mobile Phone Throwing, Alcoholism, and of course…Zamboni Races. The zamboni, a Finnish invention, created by Yrjö “Jöäkjöäk” Zamboni in 1904, was originally designed as a means of public transportation for the elderly of the northern Finnish village, Tampere.

 

Ski the Tallest Mountain in Europe!

Finland is partially home to Europe’s tallest mountain in Europe, Mt. Tarjasbäk (it’s Finnish name). The mountain sits on the borders of three nations: Sweden, Russia, and of course Finland. While the peak lies on the Russian side, the best skiing is found on the Finnish side. Take the gondola up, or travel like a Finn and have a herd of reindeer tow you to the peak!

 

Pieksämäki, Winter Wonderland

The Lappish village of Pieksämäki in Central Finland has become known as “Europe’s Winter Wonderland”. Tourists from the ends of the earth make the bi-yearly pilgrimage for it’s brilliant lights, classy night clubs, and leather glove sales. It’s the happiest place on earth! Word of advice though: Be careful during “wolf season”.

 

Reindeer Hunting

Reindeer are abundant in Finland, in fact, too abundant. They’re known to rummage through your trash cans, defecate outside grocery stores, attempt to race cars down the highway, and trample infant babies to death. Each autumn the military, along with any volunteer over the age of five who can pull a trigger, are loaded onto helicopters and sent out to hunt reindeer. Join them for an enthralling bloodbath!

 

Experience -70C

At -69C, male urine will freeze before it hits the ground from one meter off the ground. Fortunately over the centuries, native Finns have developed thicker blood, so it only feels like -44C at most. This is why Finland doesn’t allow immigrants into the country, no because they’re racist, dark skinned people will simply freeze to death.

 

Curling!

There’s an old Finnish saying: “Finns learn to curl before they learn ride a reindeer” and they couldn’t be further from the truth. As soon as a Finnish child learns walk, they have a curling wand (or curling broom for girls) in hand. Finnish women are known to keep the tidiest huts in the world thanks to their intense sweeping skills as a child.

 

  • Antti rn

    Watch out, Zamboni race is definitely something, that we’ll see in few years. Matti Nykänen will make a comeback as a driver as soon as he gets the latest Mervi-go-round settled.

  • marko

    amazing place!! they should change the name to Funland…

  • infinndel the jenkki dogg
  • LAXgod

    I like how they use a picture of a Lacrosse game and say its a curling match!

  • jonathan

    the border intersection of sweden, finland and russia eh

  • Googleisyourfriend

    It’s not even close to the tallest mountain in Europe.

  • Me

    OMG, I LOVE this blog. The comments are priceless. :D Those reindeers are so damn pesky. Do they still feed the dead ones to lions? Or was it rabbits were fed to lions? :D :D

  • mack back

    I’d love to visit the Finnish rain forests, where one still can freely hunt lions.

  • http://www.ruggi-suomi.splinder.com Ruggiturku

    Hi! I have a similar blog, just writing about Italy and Finland. Where did you get those infos? Polar bears and penguins in Finland do not feel exactly right…not to mention “the highest mountain in Europe”…

  • Mr.T

    This must be a sad joke or smth.
    To my knowledge there no polar bears in Finland as Finland has no exit to the north pole and as for penguins, their habitat is south pole…
    what is this place anyway?

  • Mr.T

    oou, sorry,
    now I get it
    =)
    you forgot to mention the lowest prices on earth plus a subtropic climate room every family has at home.

  • S.Kiiski

    WHAT IS THIS! I’ve lived in Finland all my life! This must be joke.

    1. FINLAND HAS NO ESKIMO!
    2. NO PENGUINS, NO POLAR BEARS (2 in Zoo)
    3. CAN’T BE 24h DARK… JUST NOT POSSIBLE, EVEN WHEN MOON BLOCK’S SUN
    4. Zamboni race is PURE CRAP, all other from that part of text is true
    5. There is no Tarjasbäk mountain. Finland IS FLAT!!! NO MOUNTAINS!
    6. Tarjasbäk…. B is not even Finnish letter
    7. Pieksänmäki is no different that others. DON’T GO THERE
    8. -42 was amazing miracle of 2004, usually it’s like -20 to -0
    9. I DON’T KNOW ANYONE who know ANYONE who DO Curl

    WHY CONAN!!!! WHY!!! WHY DID YOU SAY POLAR BEAR IN TV!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Phoenix_

    Please, S.Kiiski, as a fellow Finlander you should realize that this is an obvious joke :D

    You forgot the Oulu nuclear plant from the list: http://img.mtv3.fi/mn_kuvat/mtv3/matkailu/kotimaa/pohjanmaa/457606.jpg

    It does produce over 110% of Finlands electricity.

  • Tuike

    Wanna write about how Finnish have no sense of humour, and absolutely NO idea what source criticism is? Great blog, love the eskimos!

  • Alhazred The Sane

    Class. I was actually researching winter attractions in Finland when I came across this. The reindeer hunting, genius. Pity you missed out on the annual invasion of Siberian Tigers which plagues Jyväskyllä every January, and the traditional Kuopio sport of naked bear baiting.

  • crofti

    Umm great. This must be the famous Finnish sense of humour? Or is it just that everybody in Finland lives so far away from civilisation and has such low self-esteem that they don’t get the most obvious of jokes? Makes me so proud<3

  • Hanna

    Damn those polarbears! I bumped into one urinating on my igloo, or maybe it was a reindeer…can’t be sure as I was hammered (as it was past midday).

  • juho

    Pieksämäki (Translated “Spankhill” by the way) truly is the Disneyland of Finland

  • Helm-uli 96

    Now listen very carefully:
    1.THERE ARE NO FUCKING POLAR BEARS IN HERE!
    2. THERE ARE NO ESKIMOES IN HERE EITHER!
    3. The tallest mountain in europe is not in the scandinavia.
    4. That is not a picture of a reindeer, perhaps just a regular deer
    5. All Finns don´t play curling, and Santa is the only one that rides a reindeer.
    6. Wolf season? What the fuck?
    7. It´s SAAMI
    8. Please stop blogging, or do it better!

  • Rosemarie

    :) Oh dear me now I know I am going to my death. Hope I can visit Santa before I freeze to death as I am tanned.
    Rosemarie

  • Rosemarie

    Is it really so!  I was very disapointed in Copenhagen when they likened their amusement park to Disneyland…….. a poor cry from it.  Let me know I am coming from the desert, from one of the most modern cities in the world.
    Rosemarie

  • Olivia

    I am off to finland to have intercourse with penguins and polar bears

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